Loved it

Makes me wonder about life about truth about this, why it has to be so complicated

I heard this in a movie (Sweet Home Alabama), a long time back. Probably was in my school years I really didn’t understand what was so complicated about life then. Life to me then was easy and systematic, follow what was told to you and that was it, no more questions asked no more answered. And I felt there was nothing missing to it; I had all that I wanted right in front of me. Happy memories surrounded me of family and of a few friends I knew.

I remember those high school days, waking up at 5 though sleep would not have left my eyes to mom’s hot cup of steaming tea. I had or rather have very strange hunger timings and at 5 in the morning I was desperate for food and since nothing would be prepared by then, would settle for biscuits with tea… then stare at the books… studying for public exams i.e. remembering that I had tuitions at 7:00 am and yes the teacher would question me so better study. She used to call me dainty darling and I did have company to that name, my best friend.

Going to school after that, starting with catechism… talking rather yapping, full swing and then English.. and then I don’t remember.. until its Social Science.. sleeping away in glory thankfully not thrown out of class, copying math home work since was always lazy to break my head on those stuff. Run for math tuitions after school.. then go cycling with friends for a while, get back home.. finish home work… TV.. food happy time at home and ye long lectures from dad on how if I don’t study good… no good college and sleep.. that was it.. half of the lectures I wouldn’t even be listening.. because I was too busy thinking of tomorrow and how we could have more fun… lol. Favorite time pass was writing down lyrics.. and singing around.. Was part of the choir. Bunking class and just chilling out.. was fun.

Life is more enjoyable and less complicated when its simple I guess. Its beautiful the gift of life… so much to do.. so much to take in… so much to give… its an awesome thing.. no matter how awesome less .. may be life as from each ones perspective

Waving hands

Days are strange, nights seem warmer
They keep moving, as though in an infinite circle
Never to end, as though there never was a stop
It kept yearning to know its end
But never to find the end!!
And then it remembered a day long ago
The warm shady but windy morning
When it saw the end…..but never did it realize it
Because it never wanted life to stop
It was a new beginning, which seemed like the end
Held on to it till dusk, yearning for what seemed to be the end
For it to ask, will you stay, but never did the question come
And by dusk, all that was left was a waving hand.
Staring into infinity
And the cycle continues never to change…
Seeing two waving hands is enough for now…..
Waiting for time to answer
Questions you know not anything about…
With memories of waving hands…

The Circle of Life

On a beautiful rainy morning in June I was staring outside at the rain coming down as though it was god's way to say.. Let this be the symbol of my blessings being showered on you. The rain kept falling and i kept on staring.. As though I knew I was bonded with nature with some weird force I knew nothing about. I felt as though I could see through every drop falling on the ground, as though they were reflections of my soul falling from above.. something I thought was a waste that his divine mercy had collected like pearls
And when I asked him where are my blessings.. he just dropped all these worthless thing I thought as rain drops.. and I realized it was beautiful… I could never collect them back.. but those drops of water which resembled me watered the ground… helped the plants to grow.. it brought life back to the dry and worn ground, and that brought me joy.. not that I could gather back the pearls I thought were of no use but were precious.. but I knew it helped a whole lot of the others.. and that was the weird force which I felt when I saw the rain.

It is always beautiful the see the fruit of your hand flourish,, which made me wonder that day about us children.. and our parents… we are the fruit of their effort, the flesh and the blood.. their sacrifice they are all and still when the age comes.. they just fly out…. Yearning to flap their wings and fly.. they forget so fast the roots they had… the safe haven which knew not danger…. And at times parents forget how beautiful and strong their kids wings have grown that they need to spread it out and fly… yes it is their hard labor which flies into the uncertainty and cruelty of life.. and life experience makes them say no to their decisions and their adventures.. but its their turn to life.. to have that life experience which they have today. We only survive if it is a give and take relation.. parents and kids, husband and wife, friends as in fact any relation… And yes the wisdom to draw your lines clear .. just so that you don’t hurt yourself or the wings.. which helped you fly.

Flying the skies of life you meet people ..some your friends, some your acquaintances, your relatives who were strangers before.. some to stay forever to leave their mark on your life and some to leave without a trace… And in between all this sometimes we find those people rather the person who you don’t want to leave.. like you want them to stay forever with you.. to travel with you to the 7 seas to be yours forever.. to be your adventure… at times they don’t feel the same about you.. and at times you realize this was not the one for you.. and you search again.. If your lucky you will find the one… you want to share your adventure with you .. who would stay with you…And you start a new adventure.. something new .. something you knew nothing about.. and you realize this isn’t the person out of the fairy tales.. but the human who has weakness…but that doesn’t stop you from loving… Attraction maybe an emotion… but true love is not an emotion which keeps changing from time to time.. but it’s a will .. a will to survive all odds. Its only this will which is going to get your adventure places.

And then you create your very own nest at the place of your dreams…and start your own
Pack.. and the cycle continues…. The cycle of life,,

But as a person.. what do you gain.. other than the you circling the circle of life.. and fading away into the past. Some creates legacies to last for centuries.. some fade away with no trace.. To you, as a person, as an individual what do you earn.. what is life worth other than the normal cycle of life… Was such a beautiful thing, LIFE created just to fade
Or to end with a story which will circle to generations… what do you give yourself…or rather gain for you.. is it just going to end with the grave…or the ashes…..

There is this void in every human… which yearns for something which could never be satisfied by anything in the world… no human, not the money, the fame, the high life could satisfy it… But there is a way this quench can be satisfied.. Knowing your creator…
Going back to him.. allowing him to work in you…. In ways even you don’t realize is what will quench the void…... With all your wisdom if you search him.. he will not come.. but if you go like a child to its father .. he will reveal himself… and your longing will be quenched.. It is what name you give him.. or does he already have a name… I leave it to you, who reads this, to figure that out…

And it is this conscious acceptance of your creator which distinguish you from ending with the grave or the ashes.. from fading into the future, or the legacy that you create.. .That is for others to decide, but for you it is this acceptance that changes the very concept of being you…..

I suddenly realize I just started my journey.. just started flapping my wings.. staring at the rain…… I realized you know your story…you know how you started.. you know how it is going to end.. you do not know how the in between would be….but that’s the thrill of life.. the essence of life… but the creator did give it in your hands.. how you wanted the in between of your life be filled.. Its your choice your free.. will.. he z a gentleman isn’t he .. doesn’t poke his nose into your business unless he is asked to 

Thoughts circled me.. even as my abrupt thinking had a stand still…in this crazy merry go round.. And I realized.. gal slow down.. one day at a time… take it easy..
And I kept staring back at the rain…to see how beautiful it was……….

April 27th 2010 11:15pm

By the way what was the coffee thing about lol…
The wanderings thoughts of a nearly lost soul

Yesterday Today Tomorrow

To the past we pay our respect,
To the present our admiration,
To the future our amazement
Yet what differentiates these three

The past brings memories, long forgotten,
And some seem as fresh as though it was today
Some we cherish, some we disregard,
As though they never were true
But the truth is what you are today,
Is what you became
When life took you through those circumstances
You respect yourself, you respect your past

What keeps you today?
Thankfulness that there was a yesterday
And gratefulness that yesterday blossomed into today
You choose what becomes of today
For better or for worse, it’s yours to behold
Never make a mistake of regretting, what you did
Or what others made you do
You do get just one shot, make the best of it
Never regret, know, it was your choice

The future could never be seen
But the hope that tomorrow is going to be better than today
Keeps the world moving!
The power lies within you, whether to be happy or to be sad
But know that your tomorrow is always the result of you yesterdays
And at times, mistakes of your past take over your future
But mercy from above could change it

What is the difference between the three?
None I guess
All three is in the hands of your maker
Receive them well, as though a reward
Make sure, you never loose any of the chances
To make the best of it
Yesterday today and tomorrow is always a labyrinth
To which we and only we have the key to unlock

Witness to Ages: The Town

The streets bore the history of ages
The houses bore the stories of families of who were considered different
The trees were the silent life, witnessing the cruelties and happiness of ages
People looked different from the rest

Even in the midst of the differences
You could see the beauty rising in between
The pride, the architecture carried in them
The beauty of the trees, which stood as silent witnesses of life, as centuries passed by
The community which grew as a mixture of different cultures
Was unique as the colors in the rainbow

The languages spoken were different and unique
Which would make you wonder?
When God divided the people, by changing the languages they spoke
Was it the same little town..
Only that they didn’t move away because of their linguistic difference
But shared what was left from the ages

The sea added beauty to the old little town
The mansions and the bungalows faced the waves on beach,
Stood there silently as witness to the turn of the century
The seagulls circling the Chinese nets, to feast on the fishes
And the little canoes being brushed against the waves
The sea stretched itself as a blue lining necklace to the little town

And when the evening dawned,
The place would be covered with the dark blue blanket with stars sparkling
And the sound of waves on the shore, would grow loud
And the smell of the sea weeds on the shore
The cemeteries of the reminiscent past are seen in soft moon light
And the chuckles of the kids from far off, can be heard

This town may stand as a pole held high to the people
As a token from history
But to me, it would be a place called HOME
Where I would run back to, when I am scared, for safety
Because the town gave you a feeling that
This is HOME, “Everything is going to be ok”

Innocence of Being

There I see the love in your eyes
Flowing into joy of seeing your seed
But I had to see the tears in your eyes
When you saw you loved, lying motionless

I could never bear to see your eyes fill up
I know the love and the effort you put into your loved
And now lying motionless
I see the emotions that fill your eyes with tears

Words don’t matter anymore to you
But to see your loved alive
He has gone to meet his creator
And is never coming back

You still stay here waiting,
Is there the slightest chance of you coming back?
I know no one could ever replace your loved

But I pray, you would console yourself
Knowing that you could give your love
To the one’s hurting with no one else to comfort
Helping each other, to hurt no more

Hallo!! Where are you??

So there I stand, waiting for you, all alone
I don’t see people moving
But I do see the shadows passing by
I see the memories gone by, right before me
But it was just a day gone by
With no record of occurrence

Is this just a dream or a memory I want so much
Or is this reality
Are you there for me, or are you just a shadow
passing by
You never allow yourself to be imprinted in my memories
But you do want to be close to me,
And I see that in your eyes…
But you shy away, as though I never existed
When you see the world

So please stop playing games
And tell me the truth
I want to see reality
Though it may be joy that I feel or pain that I endure
I do want to see through the opaqueness of your being

There I stand, at the crossroads of life
Waiting for an answer, longed for
But I’d never be sure for now
Are you the one I was waiting for..

Dont knw wat to name it as.. Mr. Moon...

As the sun fades into the horizon
Though it seems like all faith is gone
To see the light again

The moon slowly thrives into the dark blue sky
With the stars twinkling in the night sky
As though it was singing to the onset of the moon

Maybe the sun is not here in all its glory
To beat on you, to cheer you up
Still I have my soft, soothening light

You wont trip in the dark
There is enough light for you to see...
I wont scorch you, but i promise, you will see..

Sometimes in life, rather most times
We wish for the sun
But mostly its the moon, who comes out for us

We wish for the radiant, bright, majestic sun
But likely its the creeping moon behind the majestic sun
which gives us light,
the soothening, soft, light enough to see
when you are trampling in the dark

There maybe the land of the rising sun
where pride of the race stands tall
and the land of the setting sun
where the dreams of hard working men come true

But there is also the land of the moon ....
Always cherishing to bring rest and peace
from the hustle and bustle of life...

SPRING, SUMMER, FALL, WINTER...AND SPRING

And when spring went away..
the squirrel stared into the horizon
which seemed so far yet so near
At times the distance dont matter
its about how far it is in your imagination
which makes it near yet so far...

Yes there were nuts to survive the year
through its ups and downs
But the feeling that spring aint there
broke the lil onez heart...
It felt spring was so near n dear
it would never part...
the cool breeze blowing...
the trees in full blossom
the birds chirping
the happy sounds which we thought would never disappear
but reality could never be overwritten
truth would never change

the squirrel had fallen in love with spring
and all that spring brought with it..
But the squirrel was just an animal...
and spring was just a season...
they could never be together..
how much ever they wanted...
some even thought the season did not have a heart
even the squirrel did not know..
but it longed it had a heart..
just a lie to make believe...
spring was gone....

summer came...autumn .. and winter
the squirrel realized
seasons just come ... and how much ever they loved to stay
they had to go...coz that was how it was..
which never could be changed or re-written
the squirrel was the one
who could change how it felt
to enjoy every season
to bid good-bye
and wait for them to come again
to cherish every moment again

TO the lil lady ....

Opening your eyes
to see the water which flows smoothly caressing the pebbles in its way
Fields of paddy spread far and wide..swaying to the chirping of the lil birds
the cocks crowing from the braches above the lil houses
waking one special little old lady from her sleep
moving straight into the kitchen she cleans the oven... with a little prayer
she starts to cook for the family, for her grand kid
and in all she does she adds a tint of her love she saves the whole year
for her grand kid.. and to see and hold her.
To tell her how much she loved,
how much she wanted to be close though it could never be reality
Never once has she told it out
but every action she did pointed so strongly that she loved her a lot
and this lil kid watched her grandma... working so hard even in her old age
sacrificing a lot for the ones she loved
giving the best that she could...
made a decision that once she had grown.. and earned she would come and live with her
precious little grandma.. and help her, be with her. .and maybe someday be her
but as years passed by .. winter came to steal grandma away
the child didn't know ... grandma was leaving her...
and one night grandma called her onto the bed she lay.... when winter was so close....
taking her into the world which none of us could go
and gave her a warm hug .. the one she gave.. so many years ago when the child was just a baby
letting her know she was there.. even when no one else was there
and winter took her away
but the child still remembers her lil lady....
when things don't go smooth, she think of that beautiful warm hug...
and know its alright..and makes her open her eyes to the water which flows smoothly caressing the pebbles in its way
Fields of paddy spread far and wide..swaying to the chirping of the lil birds.....
and the cycle of life continues...
and someday the Lil gal would become that grandma..
how beautiful, how magnificent is the cycle of life
though no man is ever remembered long
they do leave their legacy, their seed in some special life which will make them move on
and do the same...to some other special life
so is the the circle of life
beautiful as it is mained by things we never understand
is lIFE...